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NRA: “School shootings dramatically drop since summer vacation started”

NRA: “School shootings dramatically drop since summer vacation started”

FAIRFAX, VA – The NRA is touting a drop in the recent trend of...


Summer Camp Pals Reminisce About Sunset Views From Cages

Summer Camp Pals Reminisce About Sunset Views From Cages

EL PASO, TX – Two summer camp friends caught up with each other over...


Giuliani: “Trump can pardon himself. Stop reading here. Shit I didn’t mean to say that”

Giuliani: “Trump can pardon himself. Stop reading here. Shit I didn’t mean to say that”

WASHINGTON – In an interview regarding whether or not Donald Trump has the power...


Dog sentenced to two months in county pound for having ‘Hitler mustache’

Dog sentenced to two months in county pound for having ‘Hitler mustache’

DAVE WEASEL SCOTLAND – A small, gross dog has been convicted by the higher...


Man outraged as ‘Emotional-Support-Drinking-Buddy-Douchebag’ denied flight

Man outraged as ‘Emotional-Support-Drinking-Buddy-Douchebag’ denied flight

  DAVE WEASEL KANSAS CITY – The Internet is in a frenzy of anger...


NRA calls to arm students after Georgia teacher fires gun in classroom

NRA calls to arm students after Georgia teacher fires gun in classroom

DAVE WEASEL ATLANTA – After a Georgia teacher fired a handgun out a window...


Fox News dominates nominations for Trump’s Annual Fake News Awards

Fox News dominates nominations for Trump’s Annual Fake News Awards

WASHINGTON – Donald Trump took to Twitter to announce he will be hosting his...


White House staff puts nuke button out of Trump’s reach

White House staff puts nuke button out of Trump’s reach

WASHINGTON – After Trump tweeted threats of pushing his nuclear ‘Button,’ White House staff...


Man claims he did absolutely nothing to deserve hangover

Man claims he did absolutely nothing to deserve hangover

LANCASTER, CA – A man who drank several shots of vodka and a dozen...


Al Gore to make climate change documentary on David Clarke’s public meltdown

Al Gore to make climate change documentary on David Clarke’s public meltdown

MILWAUKEE – Following former Wisconsin sheriff David Clarke’s social media meltdown, Al Gore is...


Tomi Lahren on tattoo: “It’s a reminder of where I came from”

Tomi Lahren on tattoo: “It’s a reminder of where I came from”

WASHINGTON – Answering “5 Things You Didn’t Know about Tomi Lahren” nobody asked, the...


Roy Moore fired as Walmart greeter for lurking in raspberry lip gloss aisle

Roy Moore fired as Walmart greeter for lurking in raspberry lip gloss aisle

GADSDEN, AL – Recently unemployed Alabama politician Roy Moore was just let go from...


Trump angry Mary & Joseph didn’t thank him for taking back ‘Merry Christmas’

Trump angry Mary & Joseph didn’t thank him for taking back ‘Merry Christmas’

BETHLEHEM – After an appearance on the Maury Show by Mary and Joseph, President...


Trump: Tougher immigration in 1620 would’ve kept terrorist’s ancestors out

Trump: Tougher immigration in 1620 would’ve kept terrorist’s ancestors out

WASHINGTON – In the wake of a foiled terrorist plot, President Trump doubles-down on...