SAN FRANCISCO, CA – A local sandwich shop owner has been enjoying some free press over social media by making sure an offer to a homeless man was visible to patrons and their cellphone cameras.
“I saw some dude eating crusts out of the dumpster like a disgusting pig,” states the shop owner. “Right away I got an idea of how I can make money off it and flaunt my superficial morality around for the good will of my shop. Now all the ladies think I’m a good person on Tinder.”
The picture has been circulated on social media millions of times, generating what experts figure to be $150K worth of advertising.
“People see it on the street and take pictures and share it on Facebook. They come in to congratulate me and pay money to eat. This is the smartest thing I’ve ever done. Sure, I could’ve just given the homeless man a meal when I saw him going through my garbage, but I already sprayed him away with the hose. Sure, I also could’ve put the sign up by the dumpster where he would actually see it, but what good is doing something nice for someone unless I get praise and recognition for it?”