KKK Grand Wizard “Dr.” David Duke uses history PHD to score barista job


SEATTLE, WA – David Duke, the former KKK grand lizard, or wizard, or whatever-the-fuck, finally put his PHD in history to use by preparing some of your favorite hot beverages at a local coffee shop.

The owner said, “since we already have someone with a a doctorate in psychology, another two in communications, and seventeen in liberal arts, we needed somone with a history PHD to round out the team. I saw his online postings, and wanted to employ someone that incoherently insane as I get a tax break.”

“We don’t like having him here,” one of his coworkers stated. “He demanded to know why we don’t serve white hot chocolate, and he threw out all the creamers and replaced it with whitener. He flat out refuses to serve coffee black, and changed it to ‘covfefe’ on the menu”.

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Dave Weasel

writer | comedian | musician | canadian | etc

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