NRA calls to arm students after Georgia teacher fires gun in classroom


ATLANTA – After a Georgia teacher fired a handgun out a window in his classroom, the NRA is calling to arm the students in order to protect themselves.

“We’re not arming all these children,” stated an NRA member. “That’s ridiculous. We are making sure only the kids with extensive experience in army cadets carry weapons.” President Trump addressed the issue at a conference, adding, “It would only be about 20% of them. There would be great training for these kids between soccer practice and sleepovers. We would hopefully give them a bonus, a second dessert or something.”

The President also tweeted, “It takes law enforcement 3-5 hours to get there because they’re too busy investigating my ties to Russia. During that time, the kids can easily take on the shooter if they have the weapons to do it.”

In the meantime, thoughts and prayers continue to do nothing.

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Dave Weasel

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