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Joe Biden fears marijuana a gateway to excessive Postmates orders


WASHINGTON – Former Vice President Joe Biden announced he will not legalize recreational use of marijuana, citing lack of evidence users will not over-order on food delivery apps.

“I’ve seen what the reefer can do to a man,” the presidential candidate stated. “One time my old friend Corn Pop smoke and drove. He held up the freeway doing a quarter of the speed limit! These days kids are ordering Snickers bars by the dozen with a jar of mayonnaise on food delivery apps. And just last week, a teenager ordered Little Caesars on Postmates! What kind of monster pays extra to have such dirty pizza delivered to them when they can get free delivery almost anywhere else?”

Joe Biden is the former vice president and is running for president in the 1920 election.

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Dave Weasel

writer | comedian | musician | canadian | etc

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