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Trump trains hard for Olympic backpedaling

WASHINGTON – As Republicans begin to hold President Trump...


#WalkAway bot becomes self-aware, falls in love with its programmer

MOSCOW – A robot designed to flood social media...


NRA: “School shootings dramatically drop since summer vacation started”

FAIRFAX, VA – The NRA is touting a drop...


Summer Camp Pals Reminisce About Sunset Views From Cages

EL PASO, TX – Two summer camp friends caught...


Sarah Palin: God takes ‘magic dumps’ to preserve American language

ERIC NORDQUIST WASHINGTON, DC – At a recent pro-war rally, Sarah Palin explained how she would like to help Donald Trump fix America with the help of God. “You see, God dumped gold and frankincense and all other kinds...


Donald Trump promises to deport all immigrants “back to Alaska”

DAVE WEASEL EDISON, NJ – During a recent tour stop in New Jersey, Donald Trump made his stance clear on immigration and what he plans on doing about it. “I want to make America great again,” Trump states to much...


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