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Dangerous new teen trend sees students lunging at school shooters

LOS ANGELES – Between car surfing, alcohol enemas, car...


PHOTO FINISH: Lawmakers get mistresses’ abortions before banning them

ATLANTA – What a move! Moments before Georgia signed...


Realizing a president isn’t above the law, Trump promotes himself to king

WASHINGTON – With his son Donald Jr. subpoenaed over...


Migrant caravan threatens American way of life at McDonald’s drive-thru

FARGO – The worst fear of conservatives became real...


Sarah Palin: God takes ‘magic dumps’ to preserve American language

ERIC NORDQUIST WASHINGTON, DC – At a recent pro-war rally, Sarah Palin explained how she would like to help Donald Trump fix America with the help of God. “You see, God dumped gold and frankincense and all other kinds...


Donald Trump promises to deport all immigrants “back to Alaska”

DAVE WEASEL EDISON, NJ – During a recent tour stop in New Jersey, Donald Trump made his stance clear on immigration and what he plans on doing about it. “I want to make America great again,” Trump states to much...


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