Man sends 53 unanswered messages about first novel he is writing to Tinder match

Man sends 53 unanswered messages about first novel he is writing to Tinder match

DAVE WEASEL BROOKLYN, NY – A 24-year-old woman picked up her phone on Saturday...


Winnipeg mayor sends sassy selfie to new sexist, racist & homophobic premier

Winnipeg mayor sends sassy selfie to new sexist, racist & homophobic premier

DAVE WEASEL WINNIPEG, MB – Brian Bowman sent newly elected premier Brian Pallister a welcome...


Harvard University giving every student A-grades so no feelings get hurt

Harvard University giving every student A-grades so no feelings get hurt

DAVE WEASEL CAMBRIDGE, MA – In an effort to keep every public place populated by...


Man gives up sex for life to vape in a fedora

Man gives up sex for life to vape in a fedora

DAVE WEASEL SAN JOSE, CA – A 32-year-old man has accepted his fate as...


Coachella triples Porta-Potties to mask smell of patrons

Coachella triples Porta-Potties to mask smell of patrons

DAVE WEASEL Indio, CA – After several complains from neighbouring parks and cities, Coachella...


Man issued divorce and assault with weapon charge for giving wife a ‘dutch oven’

Man issued divorce and assault with weapon charge for giving wife a ‘dutch oven’

DAVE WEASEL PHOENIX, AZ – A 33-year-old man is facing criminal charges for holding...


School security guard accidentally kicks black female student 37 times in the face

School security guard accidentally kicks black female student 37 times in the face

DAVE WEASEL MINNEAPOLIS, MN – In what school officials and police are ruling a simple...


MLB finally responds to racist team monikers, Chicago ‘White’ Sox to change name

MLB finally responds to racist team monikers, Chicago ‘White’ Sox to change name

DAVE WEASEL NEW YORK, NY – After years of protest over its racist team...


Bistro owner tracks down and murders Yelp user for bad review

Bistro owner tracks down and murders Yelp user for bad review

DAVE WEASEL OAKLAND, CA – A restauranteur is in custody after he murdered a...


Chris Rock ordered to pay $1 million to white family offended by use of ‘N-word’

Chris Rock ordered to pay $1 million to white family offended by use of ‘N-word’

DAVE WEASEL RALEIGH, NC – Standup comedian and actor Chris Rock was ordered by...


North Carolina enforces ‘doggy door’ segregated bathrooms for LGBT people

North Carolina enforces ‘doggy door’ segregated bathrooms for LGBT people

DAVE WEASEL CHARLOTTE, NC – Lawmakers in North Carolina were frustrated by the backlash of...


Drunk driver sues parents of kids he ran over for ’emotional distress’

Drunk driver sues parents of kids he ran over for ’emotional distress’

CLEVELAND, OH – A 33-year-old man charged with driving under the influence and running...


Panic spreads as FBI can access iPhone users’ deleted selfies

Panic spreads as FBI can access iPhone users’ deleted selfies

DAVE WEASEL NOVATO, CA – In the wake of a terrorist investigation, a bigger...


Facebook servers catch on fire after 9 million basic women post ‘I’m Pregnant’ on April Fools’ Day

Facebook servers catch on fire after 9 million basic women post ‘I’m Pregnant’ on April Fools’ Day

DAVE WEASEL MENLO PARK, CA – Facebook was giving out a 502 error Friday...